I'm Tired.

I am tired.

I don't want to get up.

I don't want to go to school.

I don't want to shower.

I don't want to brush my teeth.

I don't want to be home.

But I don't want to leave my house.

I know what I want, but I don't want to work for it.

I'm angry.

I'm sad.

I'm happy.

I just want to sleep.

I don't want to do my homework.

Can't I just lay here?

Why do I have to clean?

I don't want to do laundry, and dishes.

I'm lost...

Someone please,

Please find me.

Find Emmalee puetz.

Am I supposed to tell someone this?

Do I email my counselor?

Do I show my mom?

Do I show my boyfriend?

My cousin?

My friends?

I'm okay. 

Right?

Lack of Motivation?

Laziness??

Depression?

Bipolar?

I just CAN'T get myself to do ANYTHING.

Why....Why.

I don't want to hurt myself. I don't like pain.
I want help.
But I can't get myself to ask for it.
Why Can't someone see this on accident?
I'm not gonna share this on facebook..
I want someone to notice, but ill turn up my TV so they don't hear me cry.

Hair Care and Dying tips (Creative Colors) Part 1

About my hair:

     I have been dying my hair most of my life. My friends and family just love to say, "Someday all your hair is going to fall out." I find it kind of funny actually, considering it's been six years since they begun saying that, and my hair is still extremely healthy. I've never been dumb about it, I usually wait months before re-dying or bleaching. My hair is thick and short but I don't have a lot of it, meaning some of these tips may not apply to you. I hope this is helpful!     

Q: How long should I wait before re-dying my hair?

A:The minimum I think you should wait is two to three months. Maximum of 10, if you wish to keep your hair looking nice with the color of your choice.

Q:How often is to often for bleaching my hair?
Unfortunately at all is to often, after I bleach my hair I can definitely feel and tell how much damage I did. When trying to achieve a light color after having dark its better to use blonde hair dye, not bleach blonde though. Using dye rather than bleach may be less effective but its the more hair healthy way, and will surely lighten the color. The most important thing to remember when bleaching or dying your hair is that, you can't be impatient. If you don't like what your hair is doing after color treating you may just have to deal. If you insist on bleaching then I recommend waiting two weeks to a month before bleaching a second time.

Q:What if I mess up dying my hair?
STOP!! DON'T TRY TO FIX IT! SEEK HELP FROM A PROFESSIONAL!Wait, you're seeking help from me? Well then, the first thing you should do is, don't panic! Depending on how badly you messed up, it's most likely fixable. There are tons of ways you could have screwed up so i'll stick to just a bad dye. If you intend on fixing it yourself you should start with a shower. Rinse your hair like there is no tomorrow! Now obviously this wont remove all the color,  but if you act quick enough you can hopefully remove quite a lot of the product. I don't recommend trying to dye again, not even the next day. Maybe you're like me though and dye your hair on Sunday with no room for mistake. In that case, and ONLY in that case should you use the "Dish soap method." That involves washing your hair out with dish soap, as i'm sure you guessed. I know that sounds crazy but the soap will strip the color from your hair. Don't get me wrong it is damaging as well but not nearly as damaging as dying your hair twice in a a row. After washing the soap through your hair, very thoroughly, use lots of conditioner and moisturizer to re-vamp your hair. If that doesn't work, don't dye it. Style it, up-do's are the best way to go unless your roots are out of whack, then curl! Don't forget a heat protection product ! if anyone says something tell them the truth, and if you're committed to dying your hair then rock it, who cares! 

Oh no! This post messed up, half of it didn't save! I feel like a fool now, ha.
My solution, i'll make a "Part two" So expect that! So sorry!

Valentines Diary (Please Comment!)

Today I wanted to have a short talk about comments! I work pretty hard on my blogs and would enjoy some feed back! If you're there and you read my stuff, follow, comment, I want to know who enjoys my content! I'm 100% open to constructive criticism! I would also looove to know where you found me or how you stumbled on my blog, facebook, tumblr, pinterest, twitter, instagram!

So I challenge you, to comment!

#ValentinesDiary

 

Valentines Diary (Inspiration)

I want to become more inspirational. My mother and cousin both kind of lost inspiration. For me I really don't understand how you could lose something so important. I've been searching through space and time to find a solution for them. Here is my game plan..

I'm going to ask them 5 questions to stir their thoughts.

1: What inspires you?

2: How many forms of beauty do you see in just one room?

3: What beauty do you see in thoughts?

4: What do you crave to create?

5: When drawing do you make a plot of what you're going to do?

After asking these questions i'm going to have them attempt to meditate with me.

If one or both cant get into it ill ask them to close their eyes with me and listen to "Lillium" the intro song to Elfen Lied

I've been asking myself, how do I get inspired? How do lines and shapes inspire me? Where does it come from? I'm never sure why something stands out to me or just makes me need to draw. My conclusion is that in the style I love drawing so much, manga, I can relate that shape, that line, or even a scene i'm looking at to my art style.

I'm going to ask them 5 more questions.

6: What do you think is your art "style"?

7: Why do you chose that as your one go-to style?

8: Do you consider stepping outside of your style?

9: What drew you towards your style?

10: Why did you ever draw?

I'm hoping by asking them these questions it will get them looking and thinking at little things. Wish me luck!!

#ValentinesDiary

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Quick Social Media Update!

Hey just wanted to update where you can find me!!!

NOW ON PINTEREST: https://www.pinterest.com/asthesiren/valentines-diary/

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See you there!

#ValentinesDiary

Valentines Diary Surprise

Surprise blog! Lets get in touch with your inner nerd/hipster! These are my top 5 favorites for December and January! If this isn't your thing I encourage you to continue reading! I've found many things in favorite videos/blogs that I am interested in and would have never known about. So don't shy away yet! I'll link everything at the end!

My first Favorite goes to my controller!

This controller is absolutely beautiful! The chrome series controllers make you feel divine while playing, no joke!

Second, and a close runner up for first is my Vampire Knight body pillow!

Having this makes my room so much more nerdy! LOVE! It isn't very soft but has a beautiful clear picture of Yuki!

Third goes to my art!

This is of Zero from Vampire Knight.

Two custom characters of mine!

Fourth has to be the games I've been obsessing over.

I played Bioshock Infinite LONG ago but still love it and have played through it at least 7 times, and am working on the 8th! Bioshock games have a way of drawing you in and making you fall in love.

My Game Rating: 10/10

Yes, Saints Row IV. This game is so epic. You constantly feel powerful.Must play!

My Game Rating: 9/10

The Legend of Zelda, Wind Waker. Now, before you go off and call this game garbage let me inform you, this game deserves a chance. Watch a play though if you want before, but i promise this game is amazing! Also a huge part of my childhood! I'll link a lets play at the end too!

My Game Rating: 10/10

Fifth is the strawberry tea from Wendy's

It does need some sugar but its refreshing and gets me through the day!

Chrome Series Golden Controller

http://www.amazon.com/Xbox-360-Wireless-Controller-Gold-Chrome/dp/B00EFRNG0A/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1423003032&sr=8-3&keywords=chrome+series+xbox+360+controller

Vampire Knight Body Pillow

http://www.amazon.com/Vampire-Knight-Yuki-Pillow/dp/B005E2WK8Y/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1423003081&sr=8-5&keywords=Vampire+knight+pillow

Bioshock Infinite

http://www.amazon.com/BioShock-Infinite-Xbox-360/dp/B003O6EB70/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1423003242&sr=8-1&keywords=bioshock+infinite

Saints Row IV

http://www.amazon.com/Saints-Row-IV-Xbox-360/dp/B00BRQN2EM/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1423003315&sr=8-1&keywords=saints+row+4

The Legend of Zelda, Wind Waker (Both Platforms)

WalkThrough by GalmHD

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLspeOI0YmcdN_E8zF0E7WnMhtgrrGAlK4

GameCube

http://www.amazon.com/Legend-Zelda-Wind-Waker/dp/B00008KTW6/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1423003355&sr=8-2&keywords=the+legend+of+zelda+wind+waker+gamecube

This game is so expensive kind of makes me happy I own one!!! I saw ones over 100$!

Wii U

http://www.amazon.com/Legend-Zelda-Waker-nintendo-wii-u/dp/B002I0GF72/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1423003431&sr=8-1&keywords=the+legend+of+zelda+wind+waker+wii

#Valentines Diary

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